I’m a young (34 is still young right?) woman and blessed to witness my foster parent’s AMAZING marriage up close and personal, but that was not my initial introduction to relationships. My biological mother was a battered woman for many years.
Witnessing her emotional, verbal and physical abuse and having a smart mouth and attitude to back it up meant I talked a lot of crap about how I’d never let a dude hit me. I bragged on how I’d never even be stupid enough to get with someone who would hit me. I talked about how I would kick any dude butt (I didn’t use that word) who EVER (with neck and eye roll accompaniment) dared to put his hands on me.
Before I entered foster care, sitting at my boyfriend’s house being my normal spunky smart mouthed self, I didn’t even see it coming. All I felt was his hand on my eye and part of my face.
“You hit me in my eye.” I said.
“I was aiming for your mouth.” He chuckled.
None of the responses I trash talked to my friends happened. In shock, I picked up my purse. Looked at his sister and without another word walked out of the door.
Tears ran hot down my face. He seemed so nice. On most days and most of the time, treated me sweet. I didn’t even see it coming. Like many people who find themselves in abusive relationships. I don’t know anyone who enters into a relationship looking to connect with someone who isn’t capable of treating them according to their worth.
There are men, women and children impacted everyday by abuse from those expected to love them. It is a life damaging experience which can turn into a vicious cycle. I won’t bore you with statistics and I don’t even know how I was able to walk away from my ex-boyfriend, his behavior was not foreign to me. Some men and women don’t know any other life and aren’t able to break free.
People involved in abusive relationships don’t need judgment, ridicule or pity. They need prayer, resources, counseling and help. Consider that the next time you hear of someone in this situation. Make a donation of clothes, food, school supplies, money or time to a local women’s shelter. If you can’t do any of that the LEAST you can do is pray. Someone’s life depends on it.
