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Love Doesn't Throw People Away and Neither Do I



The way this woman describes how she is ABANDONED by her friends is why I've always cringed when I heard spiritual leaders tell you to walk away from someone because they don't "serve your calling" or "respond to your desires" or some other shallow, surface, quasi- positive mumbo jumbo. 
Life is HARD, and in many times it comes fast but even when the hardships unfold slow. 
Depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, and other mental illnesses aren't all gonna be "fixed" on the altar.
NEWSFLASH: Most folks on the altar don't need deliverance Jesus didn't cast demons out of EVERYONE in the Bible. They may need psychological counseling, or chemical balancing with medications monitored by a licensed professional. 

Last I read in my Bible, some of the people God placed in my life are there for me to serve. And they can't give me a thing in return for my love, bent ear, 3AM prayers or warm hugs with no words because I can feel their pain when I walk by them or hear their voice on the phone. I'm way past being a member of somebodies club I mean church, for God to use me... I stay ready to be the arms, feet, and hands of Christ. Sometimes the shoulder to cry on and ALWAYS an intercessor even if the only thing I pray is LORD, send them help I don't have the resources yet for you to use me to meet their needs. I cry (yes sometimes literal tears) when I see homeless people, my heartaches when I read about missing children, and GANGSTA as I can be and am... my heart bleeds when my introverted, empathic self feels someone else's pain... even when I stop talking to people, I don't throw ANYONE away. No matter how crappy they treat me, I fight through all my feelings to forgive and make sure I ask God to forgive me for anyway I may have hurt them. The more pain a person inflicts on you the more they carry, and they give it away because that is what they have the most of inside of them. There are people who I haven't spoken to in YEARS who can call me tomorrow and I'll have nothing but love and kind words for them because the people who we're told to be quick to walk away from are normally those who need love, support and friendship the most. Not at the expense of caring for ourselves of course, but if we're happy, whole and Christ has placed someone in our lives... who are we to walk away when a rough patch comes for that person... I've found in those moments that is when God wants me to be there for them the most, without accepting abusive behavior, without trying to fix them... but to be his hands and share his heart as a conduit of his love.


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Passover also Known as Feasting on Gratitude


This Monday and every day I consider to be a blessing from God. 
Not because I don't fail, or mess up or experience disappointment. 
My victories aren't all lived out online and neither are my failures. 
This is simply the attitude I choose and when life makes it hard to maintain
The mindset I return to after minor or major setbacks. 

The truth is I have more to be thankful for than to complain about. 
Life's rollercoaster has given me dips, twists, loop de loops and turns
some have made me giddy and others left my stomach in my mouth. 
All of the experiences I've chosen to trust God to use them to bring me
closer to Him. Not just the valleys the mountaintops too. 


So many things I have to be thankful for in my career. 
I've never been closer to achieving my 
post secondary education goals than I am 
at this moment in my life. 
Thankful to God for HIS commitment to fulfilling 
the desires of my heart is an understatement. 
Humbling to watch Him make good on His word. 
Overwhelming to witness Him bless people
He places in my life to see my professional purpose happen. 
Mindblowing to see Him place people in my life I didn't 
even know to ask for or need. 
Amazing to experience Him faithfully answer prayers from
more than ten years and ten minutes ago. 

Three years after starting over to build a better life 
for me and my daughter I know I made the right choice.
God has orchestrated and been instrumental in every moment. 
I've learned so much and grown closer to God
which is a always a win. 


Jewish tradition of passover is a time to celebrate and reflect on
when they were released from slavery to the Egyptians. 
For me it is a time to thank God for being free in Christ. 
 From the moment I reignited my relationship with God
and read the scripture that says to be thankful in all things.
While life has presented me with a few ups and downs
challenges, frustrations, and delays I have been called PollyAnna
(not sure if it was as an insult, I took it as a compliment)
 because I work to find the silver lining in every situation. 
An attitude of gratitude is my goal no matter what
life brings my way because I know God will always
work things out for my good. 
I'm thankful because no matter what's happen in the end
for me "it's all good." 
(Romans 8:28)

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