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Making Room for Someone the One I Need to Be Me


This weekend started good and ended well. You may have a better handle on your responsibilities and resting but it isn't one of my strong points. Before this Saturday, when one of my girls kidnapped me, I hadn't had a day to myself without work since March. (And I kinda cheated a little bit because I showed someone my website.)

This morning I woke up after having the craziest dream. At first I thought it was about myself and 


being "sisterwives" to a taller, finer, super attentive 



Now I woke up totally freaked out. No idea what it meant and prayed all day until God gave me a revelation about what I thought I'd seen in my dream. 

Daphne Reid was actually me...the super formal, take care of business, going to a corporate event in full ball gown (complete with gloves) me. Who I thought was Allen Payne wasn't him but represented someone much more special. 


Both of the women in the dream were me. You may not have different parts of your personality that try to dominate who you know God created you to be, but as a result of my chaotic circumstances since childhood, I did. I don't need them anymore and they've actually been keeping me from the person I need the most now and going forward outside of the Holy Spirit. 


Listening to a song by Alicia Keys -- in addition to the journey to rediscovering who I am now versus who I pretended to be, wanted to be or used to be -- helped me realize I don't want to be anyone other than me. 
The sum total of all my achievements, failures, hurts, loves and losses as well as everything in between created the woman I am today and will be tomorrow. Check out the song. It may bless you. 

 

Shawneda Online