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God Inspired Girl Power to Apologize to Caitlynn Jenner

Yesterday I watched in
As my brothers & sisters in Christ
made fun of... ridiculed... judged and cyber bullied Caitlynn

The tweets and memes attacking Caitlyn
 are so ... unfortunate.

My heart hurts for Caitlyn 
I know how pain can change you
My childhood was chock full of pain
And many of the things I endured in childhood
have led to decisions I made in painful situations
as an adult ... not years ago but as recent as the last
few... months... weeks  and DAYS!

Since January 2014 I've engaged in
Premarital sex,  
Been so afraid I'd hurt other people because I was hurting
I walked away from my ministry and family
Questioned if I was whole because of broken places in a failed marriage
 Been placed in crazy predicaments and fallen in love 
in unfortunate circumstances
Making unhealthy choices with my body 
And this is with the in filling of the Holy Spirit
After full authentic conversion

Despite all the sins I've done and still DO (cussing...etc)
God still speaks to my heart
Because of my relationship with God
despite all my sins
I know I'm loved
I know I'm called
I know I'm purposed to do great things
But I almost didn't know these things
because I encountered the same kind of people
taking to Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Tumbler and Pinterest

Judging, Shaming, Disrespecting and CyberBullying 

We aren't disrespecting God
or disobeying God by loving people who sin
Because EVERYONE sins
The only person who EVER walked
this green Earth and didn't sin is the one 
some of the people being mean to Caitlyn 
believe they are honoring and serving

But is it honoring and serving to disrespect 
someone's right to choose
The bible says salvation is a choice
When feeling the measure of pain
Bruce described that inspired
His changing to Caitlyn... 
isn't even more love necessary?

I'm not saying I disagree with ANYTHING 
in the bible... sin is sin.
I am saying I disagree with the response. 
I on my BEST days am not without sin
Any and everything I do that pleases God
is a miracle to me because I'm aware of my humanity
And I believe we can be human, aware of our imperfections
and still believe all of the positive things God says about us
while working through the sins Christ died on the cross to forgive. 

But I wouldn't know that if it weren't for my praying great grandmother 
and a woman named Eunice Capers (now Eunice Rush) in New Orleans, LA
who personified love to me before I turned 10.
The love I encountered in her
Not the sermons, fussing or "holy" people
The love I encountered in Eunice Capers
Made me believe the Christ they preached did exist
The love I encountered in her
Made me believe if she could love someone
worthless as me
who was neglected, abandoned, poor,
trying to win approval by being
super smart,  sometimes sweet and still not good enough 
to be loved and protected by my mother
then maybe if Eunice Capers could love me
this Jesus she professed to love
could love me too.

What if instead of meeting with ridicule and negativity
Every person who posted something negative prayed for Caitlyn
What would have happened?
If when we encountered someone whose sin made us uncomfortable
Instead of judging or pushing them away
We asked God to send a believer He knew could 
Empathize, show love, and compassion to them

Maybe if Bruce would've met Christians like that years ago
He wouldn't have chosen to be Caitlyn today
Maybe not... maybe Caitlyn is who he would've been all along
No one knows... I do know the response 
The memes, the demeaning tweets... they don't represent LOVE

God has possessed the ability and PROCLIVITY 
to exact and execute judgement 
since the beginning of time
He could have chosen to punish me for all the sins I've committed TODAY
He didn't... instead He sees me through the blood of Christ
He speaks to my heart
His HOLY SPIRIT fills all the cracks and crevices where I fall short
He heard my prayers for the man I fell in love with
who reminded me of who I used to be 
when I was trying to heal myself using sex
He hears my prayers for other people whose pain He shows me
He hears other peoples prayers for me when they see my pain

I don't have to agree or disagree with Caitlyn 
My bible tells me to love... and I don't see where
any of the posts I've read have done that... 
I'm thankful for the people God sent into my life 
when I was hurting who showed me His love
despite my sin... because of them
I was able to confess with my mouth 
when I believed in my heart that Christ died on the cross for me

I'd been in church a long time
Read the bible and watched the adults telling me about Christ
Do things contrary to what they said.
Then God loved me through Eunice Capers... her love
Not the scriptures, sermons, music... I am sure 
the Holy Spirit used them all in concert
But I know for SURE ... and have told countless others
The love I encountered in First Lady Eunice is why I
walked down to the altar
Confessed Christ and asked the Holy Spirit to live in my heart.

She saw me... not my mess... not my sin... 
She showed love to me... 
And at times I was very unlovable...
Love made all the difference

I can't speak to who or what Bruce Jenner encountered 
before choosing to become Caitlyn
But for the ridicule, cyber bullying, judgment, and downright
mean mistreatment by my brothers and sisters in Christ.
For whatever it is worth

God loved you as Bruce Jenner
He loves you now as Caitlyn Jenner
Because nothing can separate us from the love of Christ 
Romans 8:38

No matter what you've read on the internet.

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